Evaluating

Dear,

I know it wasn't your fault. It was mine.
I will never blame you, and I hope you would never blame yourself either.

And for this moment, all I need is time.
Maybe I should give my own evaluating time.

What is it wrong with me? How come it's so overrated like this.
I know it will be so wrong if I said that I could die for you. It's will be a sweet lie.
But killing my self slowly like this also never came across my mind before.

I hate being me right now. But still, i have to figure out what's going on.
Eventhough it hurts. I have no choice.

Now..

All I ever asked is for you to be patient..with me at this moment.

Thank you.

"They say, those who can't stand at your worse moments..don't deserve at your best!. Maybe they were right"

Janji

Jangan berjanji. katamu...

Aku diam. Oke, maafkan jika sesakit itu perasaanmu karena ingkar-ku.

Do what you have to do, but please..don't promise me anything.

Sigh..Okay, but promise me you always have a space for me when i come home.

Done!

Thanks. Love you.

Kenyataan

Suara riuh rendah di sekeliling gendang telingamu itu menamakan diri mereka KENYATAAN.

Pfiuh, ketika kutanya tak satu pun mendefiniskan apa arti kenyataan itu.

Kawan, tak semestinya hidup kita selalu diliputi kenyataan.

Betul, tak percaya?

Coba tanyakan lagi, setipis apa garis antara mimpi, harapan dan angan-angan itu.

Hah, lima tahun kenyataan tak membuatku mampu menyaring mimpi-mimpi.

Selalu, tolong ingatkan aku!

Whole Body Energy

Sesaat. hanya untuk sesaat. Kita coba pejamkan mata, lenturkan seluruh syaraf tubuh dan lepaskan semua rasa.

Kehampaan?

Ternyata TIDAK!

Yang kita rasakan bukanlah kehampaan, melainkan energi yang luar biasa hebat mengalir di seluruh permukaan tubuh kita.
Semakin kita berusaha menguasai kesadaran kita, semakin kuat pula aliran energi yang dapat kita rasakan.



Bifurkasi?

titik dimana kita merasakan kestabilan di dalam dan luar diri kita. Titik dimana kita menyeimbangkan semua unsur yang menyertai kita.



Kestabilan yang mengkristal. Titik menuju dua hal yang serba mungkin. Chaos dan Order. Kehancuran atau keteraturan.